The Odd Tale of the 2019 Egg Bowl

The hate for all things Mississippi State runs deep down in Oxford. And, conversely, Bulldog fans absolutely disdain anything Ole Miss. The billboards around that state bear witness to this fact and are a testament that the hate for their respective in-state rivals runs deep and true. There has been the typical chippiness during the contests on most Egg Bowl evenings as of late. There have been on field brawls between the teams. And once, early in the last century, a clash that broke out after a game between the fans.

But, this year, dear college football fans. This year was different.

This tale is so very Egg Bowl-ish. It’s a glimpse into the rivalry’s bowels of absurdity and unlikely events. It’s late, late, late in the 4th quarter of the 2019 Egg Bowl being played in Starkeville, Mississippi. Ole Miss is down 21-14 and gets the ball back deep in their own territory after a Bulldog punt with only a couple of minutes left on the clock. After a few plays, which included a penalty and a sack, the Rebels have the ball at their own 14. And it’s 4th down. And they need 24 yards to make it to the line to gain.

The situation is hopeless, right?

There’s less than a minute on the clock and Ole Miss needs to drive 86 yards to score a game tying touchdown, you know? And then the sorcerer of Egg Bowls past decided to wave his wand and create a little mayhem in this rivalry whose hate reaches straight to the depths of hell.

Oh, yes, the evil sorcerer EggBowlius, as he is sometimes known, cast his diabolical spell and Ole Miss backup quarterback Matt Corral connects with Wide Receiver Braylon Sanders for 57 yards and an Ole Miss 1st down at the Mississippi State 29 yard line with 42 seconds left on the clock. EggBowlius chuckled as the Mississippi State faithful grew uneasy.

But EggBowlius was not done on this night, boys and girls. Even as the Bulldog denizens rang their bells with a rampant fury in an attempt to counter the evil magic of EggBowlius it was futile at this point. There was a glint in his toothy smile. His eyes twinkled with an eerie, twisted glare. It was evident at this point that he was enjoying this moment in his own twisted, sick way.

Oh no, he wasn’t through by a long shot, even at this late stage of the game. On the next play, Corral tosses the coveted pigskin for an incompletion and the game officials, completely under the spell of EggBowlius toss a flag. Roughing the passer… 15 yards… 1st down Ole Miss at the Bulldog 15…. 38 long, agonizing seconds left on the timekeepers clock.

2 more incomplete passes and a 6 yard completion by Corral make it 4th and 4 at the Mississippi State 9 with less than 30 seconds. Once again the devilish sorcerer goes to work. With the wave of his wand and in the wink of his evil, wicked eye flags fly and the Bulldogs are charged with an offsides penalty. But, it was clear that this impish wizard was enjoying the torment he was wreaking on the fans of both sides of this nip and tuck contest as first the Rebs and then Mississippi State was flagged on successive plays. It was like he was taunting the teams with some type of lure and then yanking it away so that all they had were empty hands to show for their efforts.

With 13 seconds left and at the 2 yard line Corral attempts a run and a pass, but EggBowlius was having none of that. No, it was too early for that. “Let them suffer until the bitter end,” he though to himself.

So, on what seemingly might be the last play of regulation and with only 4 quick ticks of the clock left in the game he once again smirked, and lustily waved his wand. Ole Miss quarterback Matt Corral dropped back to pass, completed a pass to Elijah Moore, and the heavens opened up and shined its heavenly light on Ole Miss as they had finally put the potential game tying touchdown on the scoreboard. The raucous visitors from Oxford were joyous. Their season would possibly end by ripping the throats out of their hated in-state rival and they would have bragging rights for a year in the great state of Mississippi.

But, wait…. EggBowlius the Evil was not given the moniker of “the Evil” for nothing. Oh, no. This sick, twisted spawn of Satan had one last trick up his sleeve. As if possessed by the demon himself, Elijah Moore bent down and got on all fours and crawled to the back of the endzone. Fans in the endzone said it looked as if he was in a trance as he hiked his leg and mimicked a dog attempting to urinate in the Mississippi State endzone and his eyes rolled back in his head.

Well, we all know what came next. We watched it on SportsCenter. We watched it on the SEC Network. We saw it on the internet. Penalty. Ball moved back 15 yards due to the unsportsmanlike conduct call. And the kick sailed wide of the uprights.

There have been many instances of EggBowlius’s antics and deeds in other games. There was Kick 6 only a few short miles away in Alabama, as Auburn took a game, and Tide fans’ souls, from Alabama. There was the Cal – Stanford game that we saw from years ago. So, as you tune in to watch “The Game” up in Ann Arbor, “Clean Old Fashioned Hate” in Atlanta, or “The Iron Bowl” in Auburn, be aware…. Be very aware… that EggBowlius is a chameleon. He’s known by many names and may appear as an apparition in many forms. But he may just show up anywhere… And suck the life out of your joyous Thanksgiving Weekend.

Yes, you’ve been warned.

RTR
THE CFB WIZARD STAFF

Leave a Reply