College Football Picks Week 11 USMC Edition

November 10, 2011
By

Ladies and Gentlemen –

This week’s picks will be in Honor of the Marine Corps Birthday and Veterans Day.

Since 10 November 1775 The United States Marine Corps has stood on the Nation’s porch like a Pit Bull waiting to be unleashed when the occupants of the house are threatened.

We have served in peace and for the past decade, a lot of war, a lot of war.

Some people categorize us as “military”, we are that but we are also a cult; a cult that doesn’t believe in putting your hands in your pockets, walking on grass when wearing dress shoes or carrying umbrellas under any circumstances.

And by chance if you were wondering why the Marines in your workplace this week were always an hour early to work or an hour early to meetings the reason is very simple.

Regardless of the time change real Marines don’t “fall back” for any reason.

I want to take this opportunity to wish a very Happy 236th Birthday to all my Marine Brothers and Sisters past, present and future. And please don’t forget that Friday is Veteran’s Day

If you see a Veteran, don’t thank them for their “service” that sounds like they just got finished rotating and balancing your tires. Thank them for your “Freedom” because that is what their blood, sweat and tears in uniform bought for you.

Enjoy your Picks…..

POST WEEKEND REPLAY

I certainly do appreciate all the “get well” cards this past week and I want to assure you that the liver transplant I received at Wal-Mart from the automotive department went surprisingly well.

I was a bit hesitant about buying a liver from “China” but before you ask how I knew the liver I purchased was from China, which by the way can be found in Wal-Mart between the Sporting Goods and Automotive Departments, it’s because I have this craving to eat a plate of Chicken Chow Mein and loan a large sum of money to the United States government.

I just wish they wouldn’t have used Velcro to stitch me up with….
That stuff catches on everything…

Too bad I didn’t Velcro My picks last week, I might have done better.

Your Favorite College Football Prognosticator was 53 and 13 or 80% last week.

And that leaves The CFB Wizard at 545 and 143 or 79% for the season after 10 weeks.

We have a lot to discuss, so let’s get to it.

SOUTH GEORGIA FOOTBALL NEWS and VIEWS

Greetings from the heart of SEC country!!!

With the Big Blue Trojans of Telfair having ended their season, I was set to take a hiatus until next year with this column and do some huntin’ and maybe a little fishing over at Little Ocmulgee Lake. However, The CFB Wizard talked me into hanging around until the end of the High School playoffs and, maybe, the College season.

I am humbled and grateful that people actually read what I’ve written. However, I was kind of at a loss as to what to do with my Friday nights. Well, I decided to take the long drive down to Folkston, Georgia to watch the home standing Indians of Charlton County take on the Clinch County Panthers to see firsthand how the power brokers of Region 2-A were doing in an annual game they call the “Swamp War”. It’s a long 90 mile ride around the Okefenokee Swamp and through the Spanish moss laden water and scrub oaks, between Homerville and Folkston. But that didn’t stop the visiting Panthers from bringing a large contingent of supporters to see this clash of 2-A Titans.

This 60th edition of The Swamp War had important playoff implications as each team was jockeying for playoff seeding positions in upcoming post season play. Clinch, the defending 2010 Class A champions of Georgia from West of the Swamp, came up just a bit short in a 21-14 loss to the Big Indians from East of the Swamp. The Tribe’s Tre Hamilton continued his assault on the hallowed Charlton County record books as he posted over 100 yards rushing and scored 2 touchdowns in the win. This well played game was another classic in the 60 year old rivalry between two of the tradition rich schools of South Georgia’s powerful 2-A region. Next week Clinch travels to Mitchell County and Charlton will host Miller County in the first round of the second season of 2011.

Everyone in the state of Georgia knows who Isaiah Crowell is, where he’s from, and they probably know everything there is to know about his diet, his dreads, and what classes he takes at the University. But, quick, who were the running backs for the Cow College against New Mexico State on Saturday?
Unless you read the write ups in the sports sections of your local papers you never would have guessed Branden Smith, a defensive crossover, and former walk-ons Brandon Harton and Kyle Karempelis. Who?

In a scenario reminiscent of the movie “Rudy”, these seldom used backups got to run for glory in a 63-16 romp over the Agriculturists from out West. In a pay off game scheduled as a break before the big Auburn showdown next week, Georgia will undoubtedly be excited to see Crowell and company back in the fold. And, by the way, the loud cheering you heard late Saturday night in Athens wasn’t “Dooooooogs”, it was “Hooooooogs”, as the Fayettville Fatback crew did their jobs in helping the Canines to the top of the SEC East heap.

In Hot-lanta, the Rambling Wreck got a week off to get a tune up and prepare for a big Thursday night showdown with the Turkeys from Vah-Tech. It remains to be seen whether the calculator commandos will be able to punch in a winning formula to try to take charge of the ACC Coastal Division.

And up in Eagle Creek, the Blue Clad Crows got a little divine intervention and Christmas in November combined, as they squeaked by the Cadets from the Holy City in a Bone vs Bone showdown at “The Prettiest Little Stadium in America.” The Eagles must have still had the Mountaineer Blues in a 14-12 game. But they blocked 2 Knob extra points, which proved to be the difference in the game. In the upset bid which was eerily similar to last years miracle over the Mountain Men, the Cadets lined up for a field goal in a last second upset bid of their own. 13 seconds left with a 37 yard field goal attempt in Gale force winds. It was so windy that Georgia’s bald eagle mascot, Freedom, could not make his pregame flyover.
The snap. The kick. “I thought I made it,” said the Citadel’s Ryan Sellers. “It was right down the middle,” said Eagle’s corner Laron Scott. “I couldn’t even look, and then I heard everyone yelling,” Suddenly, miraculously, the wind kicked up again. Sellers: “It was right down the middle, and the wind caught it…and it went wide right. It was the best feeling in the world, and then the worst.” Time runs out. The team that Erk built eeks out a win. Despite the close call, the outlook for Southern’s bid to win the SoCon got a little better with a loss by those same Boone Boys to the Paladin’s of Furman. But they’ll have to win on the road at the home of the Southern Conference’s number 2 team, the Terriers of Wofford to stay ahead of the pack. Yes, folks, the plot thickens….

In case you hadn’t heard, over in Tuscaloosa, there was a game between the Bayou Bengals and the Crimson Tide in a matchup of biblical proportions. The Cajun Cats came up with a little luck of their own as they squeaked by the hometown pachyderms by a 9-6 score. I don’t know about anyone else, but to me this was a thoroughly enjoyable game, which reminded me of how football was played in a bygone era. Lots of defense and hard hitting, like Ali-Frazier, feeling each other out, and looking for an edge. The Tide proved to be their own worst enemies though, as they had 2 missed field goals and one that was blocked. This proved to be their downfall as LSU, hung in, made some big plays, and finally came away with a win in overtime. At the end of the game, The Mad Hatter was asked if he’d like to play Bama again if things worked out right. His answer? “I’d be honored to play that team again.” Don’t know about anyone else, but to me, that’s class. That scenario probably won’t play out, but I’d love to see Clash of the SEC Titans II.

Over in Fayetteville, Arkansas, the Hungry Hogs did their part in spoiling the Columbia Cocks season as they came away with a 44-28 win. The chickens are struggling as of late with injuries and dismissals. Conner Shaw showed some dazzling running ability but also showed flashes of First Year Starter woes as he was unable to hook up with All World receiver Alshon Jefferies very often and was finally knocked out of the game late in the 4th quarter. The Head Ball Coach is doing some good things in South Carolina but he still hasn’t been able to put all the pieces of the puzzle together. He gets the receivers and defensive players, but he still hasn’t been able to pull in a big name High School quarterback to get them over the mountain. Next up for the Cocks are the Reeling Reptiles from Gainesville in a make or break game to try to keep up with Georgia for SEC supremacy.

Elsewhere, the Nebraska Farm Hands had their hands full with a bunch of Crazy Cats from Northwestern. The Felines proved to be rude guests as they came away with a 28-25 win in Lincoln. I think the Corn-shuckers are going to have to revise their expectations of running away with the Big Ten-ish Division crown.
In Columbus, Ohio, the Buck-nuts eased by a 1-9 Hoosier squad 34-20. As impressive as they think their season is the 6-3 Ohians still had a much tougher time against this perennial cellar dweller than they anticipated.
And then there’s Tommy Tubberville’s Texas Tech Tankers. I’m still scratching my head over the Red Raiders. The Gunslingers come away from a road game in Norman with a 41-38 win over the Sooners, and then got embarrassed by Iowa State and followed it up with another stinker against Texas. A 52-20 loss is not hangoverish after Oklahoma. It’s I aint got a clue football at it’s finest. But enough of that. There should be plenty of shuffling in the standings this week, as 7 of the top 25 teams were beaten. Things are about to get interesting as we draw closer to the Bowl season we are down to 5 undefeated FCS teams and only a few weeks left in the season.

Once again, it’s time for the Peach State Prognostication. I’ve been hitting the little smart pill machine (to borrow a famous expression from Leonard Postostis) and doing tons of research, to make the most accurate pick possible. The Dogs looked pretty good against an overmatched opponent from 2 time zones away. Crowell got a rest, and Murray impressed. The Slide Rule Jocks took a week off to revamp a porous defense and to try to tune up an offense that until last week looked like it had thrown a rod. As the game creeps closer and closer, I’m starting to see something in my crystal ball that looks like a Georgia win: 28-27.
Yep, I’m sticking to it.
Nothing much happened to change my mind over the weekend, so I’m taking the easy way out and it’s a repeat of last week’s star gazing.

That’s it for now. Hope everyone’s team wins and you have a great week.
And remember; make sure you support your local High School Athletics.
These are your future collegians of tomorrow.

Until next time,
I’m Harley Hanesworth

EMAIL QUESTIONS OF THE WEEK

Q: Dear Mr. Wizard
I know you only write about college football but I have to ask you with all the labor disagreements between the players union and the owners do you think we will see any Professional Basketball this year?

James – Alexandria, Virginia

A: There is such a thing as “professional” basketball?

Who knew?

Q: Dear Mister CFB Wizard

A co-worker of mine forwarded me the link to your sports “column” and I had the displeasure of having read your tripe. I don’t know which was worse, your inability to grasp the English language, your latent tendencies towards racism and sexism or the fact I won’t ever be able to get that time back I wasted from reading your ridiculous ramblings.

Perhaps in the future you could learn something from a simple children’s book entitled…
“Middle English: a primer for beginners”. That would be a good start

Sincerely – Debra, Columbus, Ohio

A: “Middle English”?
You never mentioned that you were a fan of “The Lord of the Rings” or that you were an angry midget, which may explain your anger management issues.

Q: Hey Wizard!
You did it Man! You called it! The Louisville Cardinals beat West Virginia!
How did you do it! What’s your system?
Thanks!
John – Louisville, Kentucky

A: Thank you John, but I don’t have a “system” for such prognostications.
I am nothing more than a genius; unfortunately my “gift” seems to be confined to games of which I am not “emotionally” involved with.

Q: Dear Sir –

As a registered clinical psychologist I can ascertain from your column that you may have a disorder caused from having a myriad of personalities at least that is my preliminary diagnosis from reading your columns.
Do you find that you have any symptoms of a multiple personality disorder?

Sincerely – Dr. Richard Jacobs MD, Boston, Massachusetts

A: Gosh Doc you make that sound like it’s a “bad thing”

The Great thing about having multiple personalities is that I can have a party all by myself.

Q: Dear Sir,

It’s me again and I’ve got a problem I was wondering if you might help me with.
I didn’t want to write that Dear Abby lady cause she gets kind of snippy and sassy sometimes and right now I’m sensitive and vulnerable.
You remember how I just loved me some Tim Tebow?
Well, if you’ve been under a rock for a little while, he up and left from Flarda and run off out west to play some more football with somebody else.
I was heartbroke.
I couldn’t believe that two timer would leave me and the whole state of Flarda and not even tell me bye. I still love that boy but if he ever comes back I’ll have a sharp eye out on him.
Anyway, since I got over Tim Tebow I didn’t have nobody to love and admire and then I saw that John Brantley fella. You know, he’s cute enough, and all that but he just don’t twirl my propellers like Tim Tebow did. You know he didn’t even have an exotic and foreign sounding name either. I mean, Tim Teeeeeebow just sounds so French or Spanish or something.
So I just want to know this. Do you thank that Muscrat fella that’s running the Gater team will ever go out and pick him up a fella to play quarterback for the Gaters that is as dreamy, and cute, and just plain purty as Tim Tebow?

Thanks for listening Mr Wizard

Tracy in Homassassa

A: Tracy; Timmy has been gone for a couple of years now, you need to move on.

Q: Dear Mr. Wizard
I read this week that it is the Marine Corps Birthday and wanted to wish you and all the other Marines a Happy Birthday! But I also have a question for you that I hope to share with the third grade class I teach here in Platte City, Missouri.
After all the countries you Marines have to deployed too, particularly the past ten years or so, are you required to learn several languages?

Thank you

Margaret – Platte City, Missouri

A: No ma’am, we don’t go to those places to talk.

COLLEGE FOOTBALL NEWS

PENN STATE: I have written this and re-written this piece. I am still angry, but this is all I have to say for now concerning what is going on at Penn State. I hope I can be coherent this time around.

So Penn State is going to let the big money donors and the national media drive them to FIRE a college football Legend for what, because Joe “should” have known something?

I wasn’t aware “should have known something” was a crime

I also wasn’t aware that was a criteria for firing somebody, then maybe I should be the “only” source of College Football News (I suppose I am anyway) because the entire National Sports media and media in general “should have known” the “real” story about Reggie Bush and the Southern California Trojans for five damn years, right? Do you need some more examples, some maybe a little closer to “home” for some of you expert media types, because I have a few more I could share with you.

There is a lot I could say about this topic and the way Coach Joe has been treated this past week, but I will simply say this; you should all be ashamed of yourselves for the way you are treating Joe Pa and believe me; you vultures will reap what you sow

AUBURN: This week the Auburn Tiger Family lost a true matriarch….

Evelyn Walker Jordan, the wife of Auburn’s legendary coach Ralph “Shug” Jordan.

Mrs. Jordan died following a brief illness last Thursday at age 98. She was laid to rest this week at Holy Trinity Episcopal Church in Auburn this week.

She was a native of Augusta, Georgia and grew up in Macon, Georgia and Columbia, South Carolina where she received a bachelor’s degree in sociology from the University of South Carolina.

She did graduate work at Tulane University in New Orleans and later earned a master’s degree at Auburn, where she served as Panhellenic adviser and worked as a counselor for married and international students for many years.

She received the university’s Pamela Wells Sheffield Award in 1992 in recognition of her service and commitment to Auburn.

And I would like to add…..

Miss Evelyn was a real Southern Lady and a fine person.
She was class, dignity and strength covered in Southern Charm.
They don’t make too many ladies like her anymore.

She will be deeply missed, deeply missed.

ESPN COLLEGE FOOTBALL STUDIO: The problem about trying to talk about “all” the other sports going on during College Football Saturday’s is that it can have a tendency to tongue tie the commentator. Such was the case this past Saturday when everybody’s favorite ditzy sports blonde ESPN’s Wendi Nix had this to say in the College Football Pre-game Studio Show….

“And to NASCAR, this weekend….
We will see if Tony Stewart can take home another Checkered Fag this weekend in Texas….”

EDITORS NOTE: And that my friends is why I don’t follow NASCAR…
I think they have taken this “Diversity” thing a little too far.

OKLAHOMA STATE: Your Quarterback is 28 years old? Really?

Shouldn’t he have been playing in the NFL for like five years already?

CBS COLLEGE FOOTBALL: From the “Here we Go Again” files….

We all know Vern “The syphilitic dwarf” Lundquest and Gary “Dumbass” Danielson don’t have anything good to say about anything related to the University of Alabama Crimson Tide and I finally figured why….

They are still hooked on “Cammy Cam Juice”

You gibbering idiots do know that stuff has an expiration date, right?

ESPN COLLEGE FOOTBALL PART II: This one is from the…..
“What’s Good for the Goose is Good for the Gander” File….

The fact that ESPN is losing all their credibility as a College Sports “News” outlet with most of their main college reporters, writers and contributors (Feldman, Forde, etc.) departing ESPN Bristol, Connecticut may just be leaving themselves trapped with the corrupted Craig James for more days and years than sports fans see fit.

Especially since sports fans’ days of Craig James employment ran out 23 months ago when Texas Tech gave up on their pirate head coach due to ESPN’s interference based on a James’ infamous complaint.

I think it’s time to start a “Fire Craig James” Campaign

After all…..

“What’s Good for the Goose is Good for the Gander”

Right?

OKLAHOMA: So you are ahead of the Aggies 41 to 10 in the fourth quarter and you keep your starters in to try and score more points, right?

Real Classy Sooners, real classy.

TEXAS: Speaking of the Aggies of College Station….

The folks from Austin have produced a t-shirt that has become immensely popular on campus…

TEXAS A&M: Now before all you Aggies start sending me nasty emails (again)

I want to give equal time to some talented folks from Aggieland that produced this short video.

I don’t care who you are, this is funny.

GIG EM

Get through the brief advertisement at the beginning and Enjoy…

BCS COMMITTEE: This past week it was reported that the BCS Committee “didn’t think” that the White House and the President of the United States would file a Federal lawsuit against the Bowl Championship Committee in an effort to “shake up” the Championship process.

EDITORS NOTE: Gosh….

I would really hope that the “White House and the President of the United States” would have more important things to worry about other than who plays who in a damn bowl game.

I don’t know…
Like maybe unemployment, the War in Afghanistan and the economy in the crapper.

You know, “little things” like that

NORWICH: You won last week just like I said you would with your talented Long Ding.
You have the most talented Long Ding in the Country, Congratulations.

NEBRASKA: What the Hell Cornhuskers? North – Best Western, Really?

What is that a Rand McNally Road Atlas College?

A Hotel – Motel School?

Somewhere Tom Osborne is crying….

LSU: Like the lady is saying (in so many words) below, you are Number One, but not by much.

Congratulations on a Great win in T-Town.

THE GAMES

Tuesday November 8th

Northern Illinois at Bowling Green
I rarely guarantee one of my Picks, but I am feeling unusually confident with this pick.
HUSKIES 45-14

Western Michigan at Toledo
I must really be in the zone today.
ROCKETS 66-63

Wednesday November 9th

Miami (OH) at Temple
UPSET SPECIAL!
I feel like my streak from Tuesday is continuing, it’s a just a feeling
HOOTERS 24-21

Thursday November 10th

Ohio at Central Michigan
The Chippewa’s’ are more Dip than Chip as of late.
FRANK’S CATS 34-24

Houston at Tulane
They say it ain’t over until the fat lady sings…..
She sang her heart out six weeks ago for the Green Wave
MIGHTY COUGARS 63-17

Virginia Tech at Georgia Tech
This game is going to be a back and forth affair…..
Last team with the football, wins……
YELLOW JACKETS 34- 31

Friday November 11th

South Florida at Syracuse
I have picked Phil Fulmer’s cousin (Otto the Orange) for three straight weeks…
And they have lost for three straight weeks….
And that is…
NO BULL 28-17

Saturday November 12th

Michigan at Illinois
By now you should know that every Big Ten (something or another) game is a “big” rivalry game…
This game is no different….
It is played annually for the highly coveted “Gunnysack of Flatulence” Trophy
It’s like a leather whoopee cushion…..
Never mind..
WOLVERINES 38-24

Texas at Missouri
I saw the episode when the Three Stooges go “Out West” so I know that..
MO knows stampedes…
MIGHTY LONGHORNS 38-28

Susquehanna at Juniata
The two toughest women in the trailer park square off…
Susie and Juanita
This is going to be a brawl, but just one thing “ladies”
No hair pulling…
SUSIE Q 23-17

Ohio State at Purdue
This terrific Big (Whatever) Conference Rivalry is played for the “Bucky Otter Trophy”
If you ask me; it looks like a buck toothed ground hog with a funny tail.
BUCKY EYES 33-17

Pittsburgh at Louisville
Coach Charlie is a lot Stronger than the Kitty Cats from Iron City
Believe it
STRONGER CARDINALS 28-17

Marshall at Tulsa
Against my better judgment I am going with “Upset Special”
Call it a feeling, I just hope it’s not gas
WE ARE MARSHALL 31-28

Rice at Northwestern
The Hoot Owls actually won a game last week (I’m serious)
And the boys from Rand McNally picked the Cornhuskers in Lincoln.
I will go with the corn pickers in this one
CORN CATS 38-21

Kentucky at Vanderbilt
This game is going to be close……
Real close….
It could go either way, believe it
BIG BLUE 24-21

North Carolina State at Boston College
The Pack of Wolves took down the cross state Tar Heels last week…
While the Eagles got plucked by the Seminoles….
I think the Birds stay plucked this week
WOLF PACK 33-17

Ursinus at Dickinson
This game worries me….
I just hate to think about Emily Dickinson having a sinus infection…
It disrupts by poetry reading time
EMILY 24-17

North Texas at Troy
I think Troy is about to get an unhealthy dose of….
MEAN GREEN 24-21

Buffalo at Eastern Michigan
I don’t know about Buffalo’s football team, but their wings are delicious
EAGLES 43-10

Virginia Military Academy at Presbyterian
The Keydets will be far too distracted by the sight of the Blue Ho’s to be effective in this game.
Also the VMI football team sucks….
BLUE HO’S 44-13

Georgia Southern at Wofford
I cannot begin to understand why someone would name a college after a pesky cough.
After all it is the cold and flu season
SOUTHERN EAGLES 28-24

South Dakota State at Western Illinois
You don’t think I would go against the Leathernecks on the Marine Corps Birthday do you?
Of course not…
LEATHERNECKS 34-28

Kent State at Akron
This game is the second in a series of rivalries for Akron…
Akron and Youngstown State play for the “Steel Tire” Trophy…
This game is played for the “Donut Spare Tire” Trophy
It’s very prestigious
FLASHING GOLD 31-28

Baylor at Kansas
The Hawk’s of Jay “might” win this game….
And I “might” be invited to Fat Phil Fulmer’s house for Thanksgiving
Neither of which is very likely
DA BEARS 38-24

EDITORS NOTE: Not that I would be interested in a Turkey stuffed with Krispy Kreme donuts. That’s disgusting…

Delta State at West Georgia
The Fighting Okra has been frying the competition the past few weeks.
Get the grease hot, and break out the flour there is another one headed for the skillet….
FIGHTING OKRA 43-21

Carson Newman at Mars Hill
The Spark has returned to the Eagles and just in time too…
SPARK’S EAGLES 34-28

Wyoming at Air Force
The Mighty Falcons won the Commander in Chiefs Trophy last week…
They will Fly High this week too…
MIGHTY FALCONS 31-17

Arizona at Colorado
I had every good intention of watching this game but I got “two” words for you…
“Sea Monkeys and Sea Monkey Accessories”
That was actually six words, sorry…
WILDCATS 21-17

Duke at Virginia
I have some Exciting News for the Fans of the Blue Devils!
Basketball season is almost here!
Not that I care….
CAVALIERS 28-17

Louisiana Lafayette at Arkansas State
The Red Wolves have been devouring the competition lately and Lafayette is allergic to dogs.
Enough said…
RED WOLVES 38-17

Nebraska at Penn State
Without Joe Pa on the sidelines I really don’t give a damn

Navy at Southern Methodist
These two teams square off and play each year for the “Gansz Trophy”
I am not exactly sure what that looks like, but I know it’s staying in Dallas.
MIGHTY MUSTANGS 38-17

Texas Christian at Boise State
At the beginning of the season I would have thought this was going to be a real clash.
The Horned Frogs will keep this one interesting….
For awhile anyway…
BRONCO’S 34-24

Rutgers at Army
The Black Knights of the Hudson will keep this one close until the fourth quarter and then as they say in New Jersey (Pronounced: New Jorsey)
“Fugggit bout it”
SCARLETT KNIGHTS 28-17

North Alabama at Valdosta State
The Blazers get torched and the Florence Lions are headed to the Division II playoffs.
Believe it…
MIGHTY LIONS 24-24

Washington at Southern California
Let’s see….
The Huskies have the next to worse defense in all of major college football….
Yeah, sometimes it’s just that easy to pick the games.
LAME TROJANS 43-17

Marist at San Diego
I am glad that Marist finally got a vacation and San Diego should be warm and sunny.
She is a total red fox
RED FOXES 24-17

Youngstown State at North Dakota State
The Penguins of Youngstown….
(Didn’t I tell you that school was ten miles from the Arctic Circle, do you believe me now?)
Take on the Thunder of the Plains in the Mighty Buffalo…
(A penguin cannot whip a Buffalo, I don’t care what Walt Disney says)
BISONS 41-38

Northwestern State at Sam Houston State
Sam Houston was the Hero of San Jacinto and the President of the Republic of Texas
That’s good enough for me…
Remember the Alamo
SAM THE MAN 43-17

North Dakota at UC Davis
“UC Davis, I See France, I saw your Grandma in her….”
Never mind…
FIGHTING SIOUX! FIGHTING SIOUX! 34-17

UCLA at Utah
I heard the Two Ute’s were Bruin up something special for this game, get it?
I amuse myself sometimes, well actually most of the time.
TWO UTES 28-21

Florida Atlantic at Florida International
This Battle in the Sunshine State is called “The Shula Bowl”
And it’s played for the “Don Shula Award”
You know….
I can remember when Coach Shula actually made sense…
HILTON’S CATS 31-24

Oregon State at California
Say whatever you want to about me….
But I am all about the Beavers
MIGHTY BEAVERS 33-31

Maryland at Notre Dame
This game is between two teams heading in the same direction….
Nowhere fast…
FIGHTING IRISH 38-34

Louisiana Tech at Ole Miss
Every time I have seen Coach Houston Nutt the past few weeks I think one thing…
“Dead Man Walking…”
REBEL BEAR’S 24-17

Central Florida at Southern Miss
The Mighty Golden Eagles of Hattiesburg are on a Seven game winning streak..
Make it “Eight”….
GOLDEN EAGLES 31-17

East Carolina at UTEP
This game with the Miners reminds me of a song that Tennessee Ernie Ford used to sing….
“Sixteen Tons and what do you get…”
An ass whipping by the Pirates…
I think that’s how the song goes..
PIRATES 43-17

Western Kentucky at LSU
O’ Yeah this One will be close….
Not…
HEY FIGHTN’ TIGERS 171-3

Fresno State at New Mexico State
Lasso Larry has been bitten by Dogs more than a mailman, I’m sorry “mail person”
Break out the pepper spray Larry here they come again!
BULLDOGS 28-24

Oregon at Stanford
This is the “big” game in the PAC (something or another) Conference to determine who the top team is on the Left Coast. Maybe this is just wishful thinking on my part….
Maybe I will get Lucky…
QUACKERS 34-28

Texas Southern at Grambling State
They call this game “The Bayou Classic”
And it always is, to include the great Marching Bands at half time.
This one will be no different
ROB’S TIGERS 38-28

Idaho at Brigham Young
I wonder how the Mormons in Provo feel about the “Ida Honkies” coming to town?
I love me some Ida Honkies…
COUGARS 34-17

Hawaii at Nevada
This game puts my Black Lab “Doc” in a quandary….
On one hand (or paw as the case may be) he likes Hawaii because he really likes “Dog the Bounty Hunter”; but he secretly pretends to be a wolf when he thinks I’m not watching….
Particularly when I leave my Pizza unattended…
PIZZA eating WOLVES 43-24

Arizona State at Washington State
I would watch this game…..
But I am in the process of learning all the words to “Funky Town”…
SUNNY DEVILS 6-3

Alabama at Mississippi State
The Bully Dogs have a problem….
A whole bunch of Angry Elephants are coming to Starkville
CRIMSON TIDE 28-10

West Virginia at Cincinnati
The Mountaineer faithful have had their couches soaked with kerosene for over a week…
Just waiting for a Victory….
You may now light the fires and begin the long overdue celebrations
MOUNTAINEERS 31-24

Oklahoma State at Texas Tech
GET THOSE GUNS down RED RAIDERS!
COWBOY UP! 43-17

Texas A&M at Kansas State
I know that all the pundits will pick the Wildcats in this game.
But I am not a pundit, I’m Baptist.
GIG EM AGGIES 28-24

Auburn at Georgia
They call this game…
“The Deep South’s Oldest Rivalry”
It’s going to be a good one
SIC EM DAWGS 34-24

Florida at South Carolina
Nobody (and I mean No Body) is giving the gators a chance to win this game.
I’m not just anybody….
It’s going to be close, real close and it could go either way.
GAMECOCKS 24-21

Tennessee at Arkansas
The Volunteer fans like to say “Go Big Orange!”
I say “Orange Crush”
HAWG-ZILLA’S 38-17

Miami at Florida State
This fierce instate rivalry in the Sunshine State is played for a lot more than a “trophy”
It’s played for a set of gold crunk teeth, a zodiac medallion and a 2 Live Crew CD….
Get your funk on Seminoles…
SEMINOLES 34-21

Wisconsin at Minnesota
This Big Ten (Something or another) Rivalry is played for the highly coveted…
“Gopher Cheese Trophy”….
That sounds kind of nasty if you ask me….
BUCKY BADGER 41-24

Michigan State at Iowa
This is going to be smash mouth “old” Big Ten Football at its finest.
It’s going to be one heck of a game; I am going with the home team in this one.
HAWKEYES 24-21

Wake Forest at Clemson
The Mighty Tigers are rested and Wake Forest has a wonderful Liberal Arts program designed to fit each students needs and desires to fulfill their dreams for the future.
That about sums it up….
DABO’S TIGERS 43-17

Enjoy Your Games….

Happy Birthday Marines and Keep your Hands out of your Pockets

RTR

THE CFB WIZARD

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2 Responses to College Football Picks Week 11 USMC Edition

  1. Christy on November 10, 2011 at 5:42 pm

    Happy Birthday, Marine!!!

    ROLL TIDE,
    Christy

  2. Bulldog Jim on November 21, 2011 at 3:13 pm

    Hoping to play well and win the “Egg Bowl.” Go get Auburn! Much love, BJ

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