The Great Pumpkin

June 15, 2011

Ladies and Gentlemen –

As I predicted some weeks ago…..
Despite the fact we are several months away from Halloween…..

The Great Pumpkin is beginning to rise from the Pumpkin Patch!

That monolithic creature in Orange known as Fat Phil Fulmer has support from the University of Tennessee Board of Trustees to become the next Athletic Director at the University of Tennessee.

Yes it’s true.

Despite not having any experience in running any athletic department, managing a budget or even managing his own football team Fat Phil actually has support within the board of trustees and within some elements of the volunteer fan base to become athletic director.

And some of you actually wonder why I pick on the Volunteers?

I think this is an excellent time to remember just a few details during the “coach” Fulmer rein at the University of Tennessee.

EDITORS NOTE: Please feel free to play…..
“The Way We Were” in the background as you continue reading.

Then Assistant coach Phil Fulmer and athletic director Doug Dickey concocted a scheme to dispose and subsequently fire Volunteer legend and then head football coach Johnny Majors while coach Majors was in the hospital for a potential life threatening heart ailment.

Yes friends, that’s how Coach Phil “took over”; by screwing his “mentor”.

Should I mention that there are five NFL players who have been found guilty of committing murder the past few years and four of them played at the University of Tennessee under Coach Fulmer?

To say nothing of Coach Fulmer’s tolerance of rape armed robbery arson resisting arrest threatening law enforcement officers and any other number of crimes and misdemeanors while he was Head Football Coach at the University of Tennessee.

And wasn’t it amazing how Phil’s own “personal” attorney Jeff Haygood always seem to be present to “represent” the football players through their legal woes?

Say, isn’t that an NCAA violation?

Maybe I am being too harsh here.
After all I am sure top of the line legal counsel is hard to come by when you are a student athlete with little or no income and you are facing charges of rape of an underage mentally challenged girl in the athletic dormitory.

Don’t worry folks….
Coach Fulmer said he would “review the incident and take care of it internally”

He made that statement “after” he and his attorney met with the witnesses to the crime before they had a chance to meet with the police investigators.

That kind of sounds like he was interfering with a felony investigation, doesn’t it?
The Knoxville Police Department sure thought so.

But yet nothing happened to the rapist or coach Fulmer……
I guess the rape of an underage mentally challenged girl by one of his players isn’t that important to Phil because he took care of it “Internally”

Like so many other things during Coach Phil’s rein, it was all taken care of “Internally”

The scandal that involved changing grades for football players so they would be eligible to play was taken care of “internally” and within the “Tennessee Family”.

And who can forget the “walking classes” for football players and the embarrassment it caused the University of Tennessee, particularly when some of the players got a “D” in walking.

It was all handled “Internally”

EDITORS NOTE: I still can’t believe it was a three credit hour course

Do any of you remember the academic scandal Coach Phil started that involved classifying potential student-athletes as “mentally challenged” so they wouldn’t be held to the same standard of NCAA college eligibility?

When the news of that leaked out, you guessed it….
It was all handled “Internally” and within the “Tennessee Family”

EDITORS NOTE: Nothing says confidence in your student athlete’s mental acuity quite like classifying them as “Retarded”.

Does anyone want to discuss Coach Phil’s 6% graduation rate on the football team?

EDITORS NOTE: In case you were wondering….
The average graduation rate for football players across the Southeastern Conference is 53%

This to say nothing of Phil’s knowledge of the NCAA violations of then Tennessee Quarterback Tee Martin and his “allowance” he received from a University of Tennessee Booster in Mobile, Alabama.

And just for the record: when Doug Dickey and Phil Fulmer didn’t report it, that my friends is an NCAA Violation of Biblical Proportions.

But that was o.k. because……
It was all handled “Internally” and within the “Tennessee Family”

EDITIORS NOTES: I am guessing my Ohio State Buckeye Fans are saying…
“What the Hell?”

Should I mention Coach Phil’s personal “investigation” into the University of Alabama and his string of “Secret Witnesses” that he interviewed personally at the home of Tennessee Board of Trustee and University Booster “Thunder” Thornton?

Yeah, that was all legal and above board, wasn’t it?

A hillbilly Inspector Clouseau, is this who you want running the athletic department?

The University of Tennessee has the opportunity to show some character and class with its selection of a new Athletic Director for men’s athletics and Phil Fulmer possesses neither of those qualities.

And let me take this a step further….

If “winning” is more important to you than the prosecution of someone that raped an underage mentally challenged girl, then you should fear for your soul.



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3 Responses to The Great Pumpkin

  1. Kaye on June 16, 2011 at 12:41 am

    Couldn’t have said it better. Thanks once again.

    Roll Tide

  2. Ant on June 20, 2011 at 12:53 pm

    We had ‘walking class’ at Carson-Newman as well… if you didn’t walk to class, you didn’t pass the class! Hell, we had to take our own tests, write our own papers and everything (before Al Gore invented the Internet). Of note, tomorrow begins the summer solsitce and I would like to point out also marks seventy days, count ’em, ’til College Football – Go Eagles!

  3. Icheer4Bama on June 28, 2011 at 5:43 pm

    Give ’em Hell!!!


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