Ladies and Gentlemen –
As I am sure you know by now…
We had more cancellations last week than when I tried to get a date in High School.
I contribute that to being always sweaty, but that’s another story.
But this week, we have a few rivalry games to play and we also have “Bedlam”
By “Bedlam” I don’t mean all the Bull Crap over the Kung Fu Flu.
I am talking about the Oklahoma Sooners and the Oklahoma State Cowboy game.
Enjoy Your Picks…
Weekend Rewind…
I recognize with all the postponements and cancellations last week it’s often hard to keep up.
Believe me I know.
However, even with last minute cancellations and changes, Your Favorite College Football Prognosticator was a rather astounding 34 and 4 last week or 89%.
You Are Welcome Nebraska Cornhuskers
That leaves The CFB Wizard at 290 and 69 or 81% for this weird college football season.
COLLEGE FOOTBALL NEWS
SOUTHEASTERN CONFERENCE: Here you go….
MICHIGAN: Hey Wolverine fans remember when Coach Jim Harbaugh said he was going to challenge Alabama for supremacy in college football?
Yeah, good times
TEXAS: Please see the above description and substitute Coach Herman for Coach Hairball
KENTUCKY: Offensive line Coach and former Wildcat offensive lineman John Schlarman passed away before the game in Lexington with Vanderbilt last week after a two-year battle with a rare form of cancer.
The Wildcats honored their Coach at the beginning of the game with Vanderbilt.
Class Act, from both teams
NOTRE DAME: Irish Heisman Trophy Winner and Louisville Kentucky Native, Paul Hornung passed away last week.
He was called “The Golden Boy” because he could do it all on the football field.
He was the Number 1 Draft Pick of the Green Bay Packers and helped lead then to four Championships, including Super Bowl I. He is in the College Football Hall of Fame and enshrined in Canton Ohio in the Professional Football Hall of Fame as well.
But past his accolades on the football field, and there are too many to recount here.
What I will miss most about him is simply this.
He was a Character with a lot of Character.
There are damn few of those left.
THE CFB WIZARD EMAILS OF THE WEEK
Q: Dear Sir
I am currently a PhD of Metaphysics at the University of Missouri in Columbia.
I would like to enquire as to your process of prognostications and how you go about selecting your weekly college football picks. My goal is to utilize your process as a teaching tool and for an upcoming lecture within the Metaphysics Department and with some select graduate students on a project.
Thank you
Dr. Herbert R. “Russ” Thompson PhD
University of Missouri, Columbia Missouri
A: Russ, just so you know I have seen “Live PD” in Missouri and based on what I have seen;
I have a feeling you meant “Meth-a-physics”
Q: Hey there Mister Wizard!!
My twin sister and I are writing you about a question we have ok??
I am Toni and My sister’s name is Terri and we are what some people would call twins, because we are sisters and guess what we are twins!! LOL!
And Models we call ourselves T-N-T! get it?? LOL!
So, like anyway we are blonde, like you might have guessed already! LOL!
So, like, we (both of us) were wondering if there a place we could go, you know like for vacation or something, that was warm and not too crowded, but could still like watch football and stuff like that.
Anyway, do you have any ideas, because like we don’t know where to go!! LOL!
Toni and Terri – Ocean City, Maryland
A: Sounds to me like it’s the Blonde leading the Blonde there…
Q: Hey Wizard Man!
Let’s let them bygones be the bygones with us Tennesesse fans and you, what do you say?
I am a willing to send you some of my wife’s Pumpkin Spice Possum Pops for Thanksgiving and wait now that ain’t all!
I will also send you some of my famous Possum Fritters and Possum Sausage Custard too!
Don’t that just get your taste buds to jiggling?
What do you say?
Happy Thanksgiving!
Cletus and Erlene – Pikeville, Tennesesee
A: After I got finished throwing up in my trash can…
I now understand why you and your wife have never had any recipes in “Southern Living”
THE GAMES
Tuesday 17 November
Akron at Kent State
Please do not doubt my Prognostication Skills here
I know this sounds crazy
GOLDEN FLASHES 69-35
Buffalo at Bowling Green
I won’t be preparing any for Thanksgiving next week, but I do love the..
BUFFALO WILD WINGS 42-17
Wednesday 18 November
Northern Illinois at Ball State
I must have gotten a good night’s sleep last night,
Because I feel like I am “Right On” with this pick
CARDINALS 31-25
Toledo at Eastern Michigan
The coffee helps too, just saying
RICKEY ROCKET 45-28
Western Michigan at Central Michigan
Just think…
Both of these teams have a better record than the Wolverines.
Too Soon?
Sorry, not sorry
BRONCOS 52-44
Thursday 19 November
Tulane at Tulsa
Just like a party at Elton John’s House
The Golden Hurricanes are for real
GOLDEN HURRICANES 34- 21
Utah State at Wyoming
It should be a balmy 20 degrees in Beautiful Laramie Wyoming on Thursday Night
Enough said
COWBOY UP! 33-17
Friday 20 November
Syracuse at Louisville
I have too may readers that are Louisville fans and I don’t want them to give me the bird this week.
CARDINALS 31-17
Purdue at Minnesota
I am of the opinion that the Gophers have hibernated for the winter.
(I saw something about that on the animal planet, I think)
BOILERMAKERS 31-28
New Mexico at Air Force
In case you were wondering…
“Yes” I am still celebrating Veteran’s Day
MIGHTY FALCONS 38-17
Saturday 21 November
Indiana at Ohio State
It’s going to be closer than you might think for three quarters…
Then it’s all
BUCKEYES 41-33
Clemson at Florida State
I can remember when this was actually a good game
It’s been awhile
DABO’S TIGERS 41-14
Florida at Vanderbilt
The Commodores will last about as long in this game as a Nutty Buddy at Weight Watchers Meeting.
MIGHTY GATORS 44-17
Appalachian State at Coastal Carolina
I have some bad news for the Appalachian-Americans
These birds are for real
CAROLINA BIRDS 34-31
Houston at Southern Methodist
This Old Southwest Conference rivalry is always a good one.
My Ponies bounce back this Saturday
MIGHTY MUSTANGS 41-34
LSU at Arkansas
This bitter cross-state rivalry is played each year for:
The Golden Boot
I think the Tigers get the boot on Saturday
RAZORBACKS 34-31
Wake Forest at Duke
I am sure that this is some rivalry on Tobacco Road.
I am also sure that most of us don’t care.
DEMON DEACONS 33-31
East Carolina at Temple
The Pirates aren’t worth a Ship this year
HOOTERS 34-14
Stephen F. Austin at Memphis
I can’t bare to watch the Father of Texas get a beat down…
I won’t do it
ELVIS’S TIGERS 44-10
Illinois at Nebraska
Make it two in a row for the Huskers
Believe it
CHILDREN OF THE CORN 34-10
Michigan State at Maryland
Well, look at this way Spartan fans…
You beat the Wolverines this season.
So there is that
NINJA TURTLES 41-21
Georgia Southern at Army
It’s going to be closer than you might think
FREE BIRDS 33-31
Charlotte at Marshall
Ole Charlotte hasn’t been this roughed up…
Since she got kicked out the bowling alley on dollar beer night.
WE ARE MARSHALL 48-17
Central Arkansas at Louisiana Lafayette
The Bears have turned into Teddy’s and the Cajuns are Raging
Enough said
RAJUN CAJUNS 41-10
Rice at North Texas
This Rice is cooked for the season.
MEAN GREEN 38-17
North Alabama at Brigham Young
My Boys from Florence are outmatched in this one
COUGARS 55-10
Texas San Antonio at Southern Miss
That sound you just heard, is me jumping off the Golden Eagles Bandwagon.
At least until they get a new coach.
ROAD RUNNERS 34-14
Arkansas State at Texas State
“Doc” the World-Famous Black Lab insists on this pick.
RED WOLVES 38-31
Ole Miss at Texas A&M
There will be more scoring in this game than there was at Epstein’s Island.
What? Too soon?
GIG EM AGGIES 51-44
Cincinnati at Central Florida
Another Mythical National Championship for the Golden Knights, goes down the drain.
It’s sad really
BEARKATS 38-17
Wisconsin at Northwestern
This Old Rivalry in the Big 10 (whatever the number actually is..) Conference is played for;
“The Piñata of Cheese Whiz”
How exciting…
CHEESE MEN 31-28
Iowa at Penn State
I will break this one down for you
The Hawkeyes are hot, and the Nittany Lions are not.
There you have it
HAWKEYES 33-24
Texas at Kansas
The Jayhawks haven’t been the same since Dorothy left Kansas.
And her little dog Toto too.
LONGHORNS 34-10
Middle Tennessee at Troy
The Men of Troy have a tough season, but they will make the raiders blue on Saturday.
MEN OF TROY 33-17
California at Oregon State
I wouldn’t pull for anything California if they were playing the damn Taliban.
BEAVERS 33-17
Kentucky at Alabama
Sweet Home Alabama
CRIMSON TIDE 41-24
Kansas State at Iowa State
This rivalry between two traditional agriculture universities…
Has one of the best names in all of college football;
“Farmageddon”
(You got to love that)
CYCLONES 34-31
Louisiana Monroe at Louisiana Tech
This Battle in the Sportsman’s Paradise isn’t as fierce as it once was…
But it’s still ugly
“Doc” said to go with those grumpy looking dogs
BULLDOGS 34-17
Abilene Christian at Virginia
This won’t be much of a contest, sorry
DUDES ON HORSES 141-3
Virginia Tech at Pittsburgh
This game is a toss-up….
I will go with the Boy’s from Steel Town
PANTHERS 33-31
Georgia State at South Alabama
It’s going to be close, real (real) close
FREE BIRDS 31-28
Nevada Las Vegas at Colorado State
Let’s be honest with ourselves here, shall we?
We don’t care
RAM TOUGH 3-2
Tennessee at Auburn
This game is like trying to pull for a winner in the Iran – Iraq War
WAR DAMN EAGLE 3-2
Mississippi State at Georgia
I think we already know what direction “Doc” is going in this game
SMART DAWGS 34-17
Oklahoma State at Oklahoma
This bitter in-state rivalry game is known by one name;
“Bedlam”
I am going with the home team in this one
BOOMER SOONERS 38-34
Liberty at North Carolina State
No Commercials for Liberty Insurance this week
Sorry
WOLF PACK 41-38
Missouri at South Carolina
I have no idea here
Call it a guess
GAMECOCKS 33-28
Michigan at Rutgers
Yeah, I would say this is an “Upset Special”
SCARLETT KNIGHTS 31-24
Georgia Tech at Miami
I do wish for an “Upset” here
But it won’t happen
HURRICANES 38-17
Arizona at Washington
Although I have zero interest in this game, “Doc” said to go with his furry brothers
HUSKIES 34-28
Navy at South Florida
Damn it Midshipmen…
Please?
MIDSHIPMEN 34-31
Southern California at Utah
So, Two Ute’s and Trojan walk into a bar..
You’ve heard that one already?
Ok, Two Ute’s, a Trojan and a Penguin walk into a barber shop
You heard that one too?
Well, damn it, that’s all I got this week
TWO UTES 31-28
Boise State at Hawai’i
Thank God we don’t have to see that hideous blue damn football field this week.
Yeah, I said it
BRONCO’S 38-21
Washington State at Stanford
This is anybody’s game
By saying that, I mean I won’t be up at midnight to watch kickoff.
COUGARS 31-28
UCLA at Oregon
Please see the above description
QUACKERS 6-3
Next Week…
Your Week 13 Thanksgiving Picks will be out next Wednesday just in time for Thanksgiving.
You will have a “new” story on Mikerights.com next week too.
But if you haven’t read the last story, it is sure to get a giggle or two out of you.
There is more on the way
So, Stay tuned
One More Thing…..
It’s that time of year to be thankful for what you have “not” what you don’t have.
“Doc” the World-Famous Black Lab and myself are very thankful for you readers and might I also add; We both appreciate you more than you know.
Be good to one another this week and yourselves.
Keep The Faith
RTR
THE CFB WIZARD