Ladies and Gentlemen –
Perhaps it’s a sign of the times, but I never (ever) thought we would be approaching “The” Red River Rivalry between Texas and Oklahoma this weekend with two respective teams that couldn’t spell “Defense” if you spotted them the “D” and gave them a damn “Fence.”
We have other big games to discuss this week, so let’s not waste any more time.
Enjoy your games
COVID-19 UPDATE!
Since every other platform has some sort of “update” on the Kung Fu Flu, the elite staff here at The CFB Wizard LLC Headquarters has encouraged yours truly to include an “update” in this week’s article.
In an effort to discourage fear mongering, let me simply say this:
“IF” you are still worried about the Kung Fu Flu, let me remind you that Rolling Stones legendary guitarist Keith Richards has never contracted it, doesn’t wear a damn mask and is somebodies Grandfather and yes, has even written a children’s book.
EDITORS NOTE: I have on good authority that the children’s book is NOT titled,
“Jack and Jill went up the Hill to Score Some Heroin.”
That concludes my Public Service Announcement for the Week.
You are Welcome America
Weekend Rewind…
Despite not hitting a single upset on a weekend when a lot of people were upset with their teams.
Your Favorite College Football Prognosticator was a rather surprising 28 and 6 or 82% for the weekend.
That leaves The CFB Wizard at 89 and 30 or 75% for this weird and bizarre college football season.
Not to encourage anyone to start swimming laps around the anxiety pool, but I don’t think we have seen the end to the weirdness this season.
COLLEGE FOOTBALL NEWS
ARKANSAS: I will leave this one right here…
TEXAS AND TEXAS A&M: It’s worth pondering….
A CFB WIZARD (BRIEF) COMMENTARY: As many of you probably know by now…
I have always had an affinity if you will and a soft and tender place in my heart for Texas, as it was once my home as both a youth growing up and for a time as an adult.
So, when “They” hurt. I hurt as well.
I have a solution to their frustration.
With that being said I propose to Coach “Both” the Longhorns of Texas and the Aggies of Texas A&M.
I know what you are thinking, “That’s Outrageous!”
Please listen before you make an anonymous call to the Texas Rangers and demand my arrest.
The two teams (rivals) don’t play each other anymore so there is NO conflict of interest.
I would devote half a week at each university coaching the respective teams, meet with coaches, have post practice news conferences (wearing the appropriate university coaching gear of course!!!), as well as shoot various commercials and conduct radio interviews, etc.
I would even live in Giddings Texas, which is about hallway between Austin and College Station as not to demonstrate any bias between the two universities of which I plan to coach.
I know that sounds horribly taxing on me, but here is the “Good News”!
I will agree to coach both university programs for “only” 1 million dollars a year per program.
The savings per university alone make this proposition an offer you simply cannot refuse!!
I will lead both teams to respective post-season bowl games of some renown such as…
“The Prairie Belt Canned Sausage Bowl” in Waycross Georgia or possibly the “I Can’t Believe it’s Not Butter Bowl” in beautiful Branson Missouri.
It will be an exciting time and think of the savings per university in these trying and difficult times!!
Over 5 million dollars a year PER University saved!! Think about that!!
I look forward to hearing from you both and as a side note, “Doc” the World-Famous Black Lab is excited about meeting both “Reveille” and “BEVO”.
Sincerely and Gig Em Aggies and Hook Em Horns
The CFB Wizard
OKLAHOMA: I haven’t seen a Lincoln this distraught since one of them took a trip to Ford’s Theater.
MISSISSIPPI STATE: I can’t even look at you right now…
NAVY: (Please see Mississippi State above)
CENTRAL FLORIDA: So, I “guess” the National Championship Parade is cancelled for this year, right?
THE CFB WIZARD EMAILS OF THE WEEK
Q: Hi
My name is Gifford R. Davis and I am madder than hell!
My family and I are lifelong Virginia Tech Fans (Go HOKIES!)
So, I spent $280.00 damn dollars a week ago for cardboard cutouts of me and the wife and our two kids at seventy damn dollars a pop and they put “us” in the damn endzone!
I saw it on television and there we were right behind the damn goal post!
You got any suggestions about how to make this right?
Thanks
The Davis Family – Roanoke, Virginia
A: A couple of questions here Mr. Davis…
Did your cardboard cutouts at the game eat any hotdogs or have any cokes or buy any souvenirs?
Were your cardboard cutouts charged for parking?
When it rained were your cardboard cutouts provided ponchos?
I have so many questions..
Q: Sir,
As Athletic Director of the prestigious and multi-national championship winner North Dakota State University, I would like to appeal to you to use your lofty position to lobby for our inclusion into the National Championship Playoff picture.
Here’s the situation as I see it. No football conference in the country is playing a full schedule this year. There are 9 and 10 game seasons for some conferences, and for God’s sake, the Pac 12 is only playing a SEVEN game season and expects to be considered in the playoff picture!
Well, we played ONE game for the season in which we CONVINCINGLY beat Arkansas State by a 39-28 score and we should DEFINTELY be considered for a playoff spot. I believe our pedigree and history speaks for itself. So, please champion our highly respected and admired institution for this year’s CFB Playoff
Matt Larsen
Athletic Director
North Dakota State University Bison
A: You have my vote sir….Go Bison!
Q: My name Chen Wang
I no like you say Kung Fu Flu!
No one get Flu from Kung Fu!
Kung Fu is Chinese art form!
You no nothing!
Chen Wang – St. Louis, Missouri
A:I am still laughing over “Chen Wang”, sorry….
THE GAMES
Thursday 8 October
Tulane at Houston
The Golden Hurricane blew through Orlando last weekend…
It will be downgraded to a Tropical Depression tonight
COUGARS 34-28
Friday 9 October
Louisville at Georgia Tech
This game will close…and measured in futility.
YELLOW JACKETS 33-28
Saturday 10 October
Texas and Oklahoma
The Red River Shoot-Out…..
The Texas State Fair
The Cotton Bowl in Dallas Texas
This year, the stakes are high
LONGHORNS 44-41
South Carolina at Vanderbilt
I still believe…
GAMECOCKS 28-17
Louisiana Monroe at Liberty
Give me Liberty or Give me Death
(This game isn’t all that important to me, I was just being dramatic)
FLAMESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS 38-21
Texas State at Troy
This one could go either way
Believe it
MEN OF TROY 33-28
North Carolina State at Virginia
“Doc” is still barking about something….
(In case you were wondering, “Yes” he already got a biscuit)
But I will still go with the..
WOLF PACK 34-28
Duke at Syracuse
Why don’t they just call the ACC what it really is….
“The Clemson and Everybody Else Conference”
ORNAGE PEOPLES 3-2
The Citadel at Army
It’s good to see these two Military Academy’s squaring off with one another
But this one will be all
BLACK KNIGHTS OF THE HUDSON 41-17
Central Arkansas at Arkansas State
“Doc” is giving me his “Pick” look….
That or he wants another biscuit
RED WOLVES 34-31
Kansas State at Texas Christian
This will be one heck of a game…
Whoever has the football last wins
WILDCATS 38-34
Pittsburgh at Boston College
It’s going to be closer than you might think
PANTHERS 31-28
Middle Tennessee at Florida International
Neither of these teams could beat Hoover High School in Alabama
BLUE RAIDERS 6-3
Florida Atlantic at Southern Miss
I haven’t given up on the Golden Eagles just yet..
But I am getting damn close
GOLDEN EAGLES 34-31
Temple at Navy
Damn it Navy, Come On!
MIDSHIPMEN 28-24
East Carolina at South Florida
Let’s be honest with each other
Nobody cares
That is…
NO BULL 6-3
Mississippi State at Kentucky
This game….
I am having my doubts about both teams after two weeks
BULLY DOGS 33-17
Texas El Paso at Louisiana Tech
“Doc” says to stay with the “Ugly Dogs” this weekend
BULLDOGS 41-21
Marshall at Western Kentucky
Three words for you..
WE ARE MARSHALL
THUNDERING HERD 44-21
Charlotte at North Texas
Sorry Charlotte, you shouldn’t have stayed out all night last week.
Now you have to be grounded
MEAN GREEN 41-24
Florida at Texas A&M
The “expensive” misery continues this Saturday in College Station.
GATORS 44-21
Texas Tech at Iowa State
After what the Cyclones accomplished last weekend; I have to go with them in a Shoot-out.
CYCLONES 44-41
Coastal Carolina at Louisiana Lafayette
Believe it or not..
This is going to be one heck of a game
RAJUN CAJUNS 34-31
Virginia Tech at North Carolina
I was going to watch this game, but my cheese sculpting class is scheduled at the same time.
Sorry…
TAR HEELS 33-31
Tennessee at Georgia
Do I have to tell you who “Doc” is picking in this game?
I didn’t think so
SMART DAWGS 28-17
Texas San Antonio at Brigham Young
I wonder if Brigham Young’s players ride to the game on bicycles….
I know, sometimes I wonder too much
COUGARS 44-17
Arkansas at Auburn
It’s going to be close…
Real (Real) close
WAR EAGLE 24-21
Alabama at Ole Miss
This game will be closer than you might think, believe it.
CRIMSON TIDE 38-34
Miami at Clemson
Another “marquee” matchup in the “Clemson and Everybody Else Conference”
DABO’S TIGERS 44-17
Florida State at Notre Dame
I remember when this used to be a “big” game….
It’s been awhile
GOLDEN GNOMES 41-10
Missouri at LSU
Tigers and Tigers
One has a live Tiger mascot the other has a kid dressed up in a Halloween Tiger costume.
Enough said…
HEY FIGHTN’ TIGERS 38-14
Next Week…
Next Thursday afternoon Your Week 7 College Football Picks will be on the wire, as you have come to expect from Your Favorite College Football Prognosticator.
There will a few other tidbits along the way to keep you entertained as well.
So, stay tuned
One More Thing…..
You don’t have a “new” story on Mikerights.com this week, but if you haven’t read the one from last week, it is something I hope would enjoy.
Thank you all again for your readership of both websites.
I appreciate your comments, suggestions and occasional rants.
Be good to one another this week and yourselves.
RTR
THE CFB WIZARD