Monday Afternoon Quarterback

October 13, 2008
By

Ladies and Gentlemen –

What a weekend in College Football……

Despite being a dismal 31 and 10 (76%) I was the ONLY College Football Prognosticator in the Country that Picked the Mighty Longhorns over the Boomer Sooners of Oklahoma…

EDITORS NOTE: I greatly appreciate my Longhorn Fans…
However I will NOT be a candidate for Governor of the Lonestar State Next Year…

Despite the FACT my opponent hates Christmas, Children and Darrell Royal…
“I am Your Favorite College Football Prognosticator and I approved this message…”

 

Also…..
Picked LSU to fall to the Gators of Florida…
AND said to the Missouri Tigers…
“The Cowboys are closer than they appear in your rearview mirror…”

But I should have listened to Lee and Bulldog Jim…
They tried to tell me…
Those Mississippi State Bulldogs had the Commodores number in Starkville…
Great Job Guys…
I will pay closer attention next time..

 

Let’s take a look at “The Weekend That was” in College Football…..

Enjoy!

 

TEXAS: The Longhorns have a Colt that is nothing short of a thoroughbred…
GREAT win over a CLASS Sooner Team…

MISSOURI: I have a suggestion….
MAYBE if your Quarterback Chase Daniel had spent less time this past week complaining about “last” weeks win over Nebraska and getting a “really cool” haircut and spent MORE time studying the Oklahoma State defense MAYBE you all would be Number One this week…
Dumbass….

FLORIDA: I do believe Superman does wear Tim Tebow pajamas…..

 

MISSISSIPPI STATE: Never should have doubted Coach Croom and those Bulldogs…

NOTE TO SELF: Shouldn’t have doubted Lee and Bulldog Jim either….

 

KENTUCKY: What is the Deal?
You give Alabama ALL they can handle and then you lose to Carolina?

What gives?

PENN STATE: Wow…..

Talk about “Cutting the Cheese….”

EDITORS NOTE: Yes, I am that easily amused….

 

IVY LEAGUE: You all STILL Suck…

 

CLEMSON: To Coach Tommy….
I Told you so…..

To My Tiger Family…
Have NO Fear My Beloved Tiger Friends and Family….
You all are about to get a REAL Football Coach…

Believe it.

 

AUBURN: Whose ass you gonna “Fire” this Week Ears?

That whole being an arrogant ass thing isn’t alot of fun when you lose, is it?

 

ARKANSAS: Congratulations and thank you for making my weekend complete…

 

TENNESSEE: I find it curious that “Big Orange” Fans are mad as hell that they are losing…
Why?
Because you all weren’t upset when a Vol Player raped a mentally handicapped underage girl in the athletic dorm?
And got away with it…

You all weren’t mad when the punter had five DUI’s…
And got away with it…

You didn’t blink an eye when your defensive lineman attacked a student that he outweighted by nearly 200 pounds and disfigured him….
And got away with it…

There are A LOT more stories like that…
ARE you upset about those?

Where you upset with the lack of disciple on the Fat Mans Team?

Or was Winning More Important…
More Important that ANYTHING

GOT to Beat Florida…
GOT to Beat Bama…
At any cost…

Shame on you….

TENNESSEE (PART II): I just can’t resist….

How is that having the LARGEST recruiting budget in the ENTIRE Nation thing working out for you?

I mean really…
Did you have to go ALL the way to San Diego California to find a Running Back with “Fumble-itis”?

Just wondering….

 

MICHIGAN: You lost to Toledo….

Enough said…..

MICHIGAN (PART II): Look at the bright side Coach Rod….

Your Wife still has “Rock of Love III” with Bret Michaels….

 

EAST CAROLINA: What the Hell?

Did you all just quit playing football or what?

 

GEORGIA: I want to take a moment to say Good-Bye to the GREAT Larry Munson…

He has been the voice of the Georgia Bulldogs for as long as I can remember…

I will miss the sound of his voice..
Knowing he is there, even if I am not listening to him…

Hearing him say…

“HUNKER DOWN DAWGS!”

“RUN YOU SILVER BRITCHES!”

Or…….

“Loran Whattayagot?”

My Favorite Larry Munson Quotes…..

“Hunker down, you guys!…I know I’m asking a lot, but hunker down one more time!”
– In a defensive  series late in the game against Auburn in 1982, which clinched the SEC title for Georgia

“My God Almighty, he ran right through two men! Herschel ran right over two men! They had him dead away inside the 9. Herschel Walker went 16 yards. He drove right over those orange shirts and is just  driving and running with those big thighs. My God, a freshman!”
– Calling Herschel Walker’s first touchdown run against the Tennessee Volunteers in 1980.

“So we’ll try to kick one a hundred thousand miles. We’re holding it on our own 49-and-a-half … gonna  try to kick it sixty yards plus a foot-and-a-half … and Butler kicked a long one … a long one … Oh my God! Oh my God! … The stadium is worse than bonkers!”
– Calling Kevin Butler’s field goal in the final seconds to win over Clemson in 1984

“They’re beating us like we’re Maryland or Wake Forest or somebody”
– Calling the loss against Georgia  Tech in 2000.

“We just stepped on their face with a hob-nailed boot and broke their nose! We just crushed their face!” – Calling Georgia’s last-second win over Tennessee in 2001

“Touchdown! Oh, God, a touchdown!”
– Calling David Greene’s touchdown pass to Michael Johnson as Georgia defeated Auburn in 2002, clinching the Bulldogs’ first-ever SEC Eastern Division championship

 

Enjoy Your retirement Larry….

It won’t be the same without you…

HOW BOUT THEM DAWGS!

RTR
MEB

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9 Responses to Monday Afternoon Quarterback

  1. Lee on October 14, 2008 at 1:01 pm

    MEB,

    Thanks for the MSU/Vandy plug but I can’t take much credit for successfully calling one game. You’re still a hero in my house this week (the soon-to-be Mrs. A is a UT grad). And yes, it’s still a long shot but I’m hoping for a “house divided” in January!

    Lee

  2. MEB on October 14, 2008 at 8:46 pm

    Lee –

    My Pleasure on the plug…and I Thank you for your kind comments…

    Even though I will be in Jerk-a-stan by January…I hope you have a “House Divided” too!

    Big…
    ROLL TIDE ROLL My Friend..
    MEB

  3. TheBamaPrincess on October 15, 2008 at 10:30 am

    Mike – you are letting a friend marry a UT fan without trying to talk him out of it?? Without nary a word of advice on how to handle it!! I mean, I have friends who are UT fans, but I am in Tennessee so options are limited . . . by the way, are you SURE you don’t need an embroidered napkin holder?

    The BamaPrincess

  4. MEB on October 15, 2008 at 1:19 pm

    Now Bama Princess…

    YOU know me better than THAT!

    We are talking about the “Real” UT here….

    THE University of TEXAS!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Hook Em Horns!

    RTR
    MEB

    Everytime you reference my favorite Museum, Hall of Fame and Gift Shop..I just crack up!

  5. TheBamaPrincess on October 15, 2008 at 6:47 pm

    Whew! UT – As in “We had Sooners for dinner last week” – THAT UT!

    It was just me after all – I had a “blonde” moment – Thank Goodness!

    I was just AGHAST that you were going to let a friend hitch up with a Vowel – shudder!

    And the towing thing – Hey, you mentioned first, so now we are all “hooked” (I know, that was really bad).

    The BamaPrincess

  6. MEB on October 15, 2008 at 6:51 pm

    Bama Princess –

    TOO funny! TOO Funny!

    Thank YOU!

    RTR
    MEB

  7. Bulldog Jim on October 15, 2008 at 11:23 pm

    BAMA Mike, thank you for info about Larry Munson. I can remember lots of “stuff,” but you beat all I have ever seen. I can recall events, but you recall “Quotes?” From years ago? Anyway, thanks again and I will be involved with THE BIG GAME in your life this Saturday afternoon. That means watching it on TV—again, your pal, BJ

  8. Lee on October 17, 2008 at 10:06 am

    Mike,

    Thanks for clarifying the situation regarding the UT grad in my household. I took it for granted that the capitalized letters indicated I wasn’t talking about phat phil’s herd.

    Princess, I’m not the brightest star in the Texas sky, but I’d never consider a serious relationship with a vol (or an au tigger, for that matter). I’m still arbitrating a law suit from shoving an elderly aunt off the porch last Thanksgiving. The judge understood that she started the fracas by yelling, “Go big orange”, but took exception to the fact that I didn’t allow her to get out of her wheelchair. Obviously a federal appointee with no grasp of SEC football.

    Lee

  9. MEB on October 17, 2008 at 7:15 pm

    AMEN Brother….

    IF I was on the Jury….

    SHE would be PAYING You….

    RTR
    MEB

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