Hey Yawl! It’s Hootie Snitch, the Number One Tennessee Vol Fan on the Planet!
Some people call me the Miley Cyrus of College Football, but I like to think of myself as a “Superstar” Fan! Know what I mean?
Kickoff is right around the corner and you know what that means?
That’s right! I am a getting my mullet dyed Orange!
I am going to rock the Peyton Manning Trailer Park here in Baneberry Tennessee!
Now before we talk about some football, I got a little something for the “Ladies” out there…
Something must be wrong with my mail, cause I ain’t got any fan mail since Earlene got arrested, but I know yawl has been wanting to see a picture of your boy Hootie, am I right?
Now, I ain’t going to be responsible for no divorces or messy breakups, so look at my picture at your own risk ladies. I don’t want yawl too lathered up and have some jealous husband or boyfriend coming after ole Hootie.
I am hotter than a stolen pistol, ain’t I?
Now to my Football Picks of the Year….
This is easy….
I want to say it right here, the Vols will be undefeated this year and win the Southeastern Conference, the National Championship, and Coach Phil Fulmer will be “America’s Next Top Model”.
You don’t think so?
You ever seen Coach Phil in one of them Speedos?
Enough said.
Enjoy your Sunday
Hootie – Out!
P.S If any of you ladies are interested I am right here at the Casa De Hootie in the Peyton Manning Trailer Park in Baneberry Tennessee. Just look for the plastic Santa Claus painted up like Phil Fulmer next the 1982 Chevy Camaro on blocks and you is there!